“THE PENILE CHRONICLES”

 

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**WARNING EXPLICIT WORDS USING SLANG DESCRIBING THE MALE THREE PIECE SET IF THIS IS OFFENSIVE IN ANY WAY TO YOUR SENSITIVITIES PLEASE DO NOT READ ON ANY FURTHER.

***  THE SHOCKING EFFECTS ON AMERICAN HISTORY BY THE MISUSE OF “MISTER BIG!” AND WHY THE REPUBLICAN WHITE MALE IS MAKING A LAST “STAND” DEFENDING HIS “DANGLING DONG” AGAINST THE ONSLAUGHT OF INTELLIGENT WOMEN  WHO SCOFF AT THE USE OF VIAGRA AS A MANLY WEAPON OF MASS SEDUCTION.

It’s time to pay tribute to one of the world’s most powerful weapons of mass destruction, seduction and ultimate production….THE MALE ORGAN otherwise known as some of the following expressions.

“THE ONE EYED TROUSER SNAKE”

“MAGIC’S JOHNSON”

“THE BEEF THERMOMETER”

“THE HARRY WANG”

“BOLOGNA BOB”

“DONKEY SCHLONG!”

The male organ …an “ORGAN” that makes the one in the Mormon Tabernacle look like a flea bite on Rush Limbaugh’s fat ass!!  Let us explain please just how this funny little mostly flaccid attribute has effected us all.

“CAPTAIN WINKLE” has brought down governments, caused wars and is responsible for New Gingrich’s massive alimony payments.

“THE POWER DRILL” has caught Presidents with their pants down in the company of major movie stars and minor interns like Marilyn and Monica the 2 M&Ms that melted in etc etc …well you get the massage!!!

“THE SUMMER SAUSAGE” turned David Vitter into a baby and Elliott “Spritzer” into a man who gets off wearing nothing but cheap cologne and long Argyle socks.  Nasty visuals!!

“THE BALD HEADED BUTLER” has caused “wide stances” in airport men’s rooms and even caused George W  Bush’s pastor to find a “different kind of God” through male tweaking and even more spectacular male bonding and beyond.

“THE BOW LEGGED SWAMP DOCTOR” has also infiltrated sports and caused quarter backs, basketball heroes and high profile golfers to have fallen prey to hiding their 3RD LEG” and  their “BIG UNCLES!” in all the wrong places with all the wrong people.

We can see by these shocking examples just how much ‘BIG TROUBLE”  the heedless use of “SALAMI SAMS” can be to the people in power.

“MR. WIGGLES” apart from bringing entire reputations to their knees can also alter history while catching entire political and legal systems with their collective pants down.

Let’s take.. as a final comment on “THE WONDER WOODY”… the case of a Supreme Court Judge who just loved to touch his “PRIVATE INVESTMENT” whenever he could..in his base-ment, in his office.. and under his robe. WE’RE  TALKING CLARENCE HERE…

This perverted little “BONY CALLONI” was a porno freak and had fantasies about women with large “BALOONS!” in fact he used to ask women how large their DEVIL’S DUMPLINGS!” were regularly.

When THOMAS… A sneaky little “JACKHAMMER”… was being confirmed (ALL THOSE YEARS AGO)…  he lied under oath but the REPUBLICAN limp dicks on the committee voted for him anyway.

What transpired A COUPLE OF YEARS LATER when his crazy bat-nuts wife caused a shit storm by making a call to one of the women who her husband “THE GARDEN HOSE!” propositioned  brought the PENILE CHRONICLES  front and center once again.

It was indeed  “THE HARD NEWS!

We can only hope that Right Winger Justice Clarence Thomas’s “CUBAN CIGAR” will be the cause of his eventual demise as an “impartially impaired” Justice of the Court!

In closing we now have  Catholic Justices Roberts…Scalia…Alito…and Thomas sitting in on the future direction of this country.

Frankly to many of us they look like a bunch of “PETER PECKERHEADS!” playing with themselves under their RELIGIO-corporate owned robes.

PERHAPS ITS TIME TO IMPEACH THE LYING “PORK SWORDS” AND REALLY GET OUR COUNTRY BACK.

You all know my thoughts about the “Long  Dong Silver” you just have to leave it alone or you’ll go blonde.

voter-registration

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