“PLAYBOY’S VIAGRA!!”

BREAKING NEWS!!  WALL STREET HAS THE SKINNY!!  BLUE CHIPS ARE RISING AND RISING !!!

IT’S A REALLY BIG DEAL!!!!

PLAYBOY FOUNDER HUGH HEFFNER PUTS HIS MONEY WHERE HIS CROTCH IS AND BUYS OUT VIAGRA !!!        

The Mansion is awash in the news that the 80+Hugh watches Chris Matthews on Hardball every night while only having soft balls!  BUT THAT’S ABOUT TO CHANGE!!!

Rather than the semi pulling up into the driveway with that monthly supply satisfying HEFF’S semi ..he just went out and bought himself enough wood to cover Sherwood Forrest. THE WHOLE COMPANY!!

IT’S ALL FACTORY READY!

There’s word that Heff is building an underground pipeline from his newly aquired factory to the bedroom so he can have endless shrimp for supper and endless wood for dessert.

Word has it that he will entertain the Oakland Raiderettes, the USA Woman’s Soccer team, The Radio City Rockettes and Lindsay Lohan within the next week and have his way with all of them time and time again.

Right now he’s working his way through the Playboy centerfold calendar years 2001 through 2007….

Other dudes would say he’s “making up for lost time”…but Heff’s never had any “lost time”…he’s had it on with 60 years of  Dallas Cheerleaders!!!, 100,000,000 diversified  bunnies!!! and the female student body population of several of the better Eastern Colleges.!!!!

The Smithsonian has asked his estate… upon Hugh’s passing… to donate his member to the museum so they can bronze it and stick it in a cabinet. 

All Hail Hugh!!

You came …you saw… you conquered… then you came and then you came again!!  

***Spoiler ….We heard this from Fox News and as we all know they make shit up!!! 

“SEAN HANNITY …WHO BROKE THIS STORY… TELLS ME THAT THIS IS THE CURRENT SIZE OF THE HEFNER’S JOY STICK…BUT I’M TOO MUCH A LADY TO PUT THIS ON MY FACE BOOK PAGE.! 

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2 Responses

  1. This is a really BIG story..and it’ll last a long time if the doctors says its okay.. prurient crude alert!!!

    • ha ha ha

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