“RUPERT RANTS “……….

Rupert-Murdoch-Testimony-250x178

***Making up jokes about the most humorless man on the planet is as much of a challenge as deciphering Michele Bachman’s appeal to people with brains.

Rupert came from “Down Under” and it appeared for a while he might have been going back down under the avalanche of rat sh*t that still might descend on his slimy tabloid empire. The Brit government is still trying to nail him.

It started in the UK with a hacker scandal a couple of years ago where journalists for his  newspaper NEWS OF THE WORLD were given carte blanche to illegally hack private phones..No details here read them elsewhere ..we’re getting to the Rupert  jokes…

His UK “journo underlings” were taking the hit..they fell on their swords. for the big boss man..and their swords were mightier than their pens or their computers.

One of the decapitated one’s actually worked for the Prime Minister of England as a press advisor before becoming editor of the NOTW. …so this scandal goes higher than Lindsay Lohan 5  Minutes after she wakes up.

It leads to the question…Has  the American  FOX NEWS been hacking your cell phones…your tweets..your face book?

Do you feel safe in the fact that Rupert maybe knows the color of your underwear?

Does he already know you’ guys have been visiting that “Horny British School Girls” website.?

And what about all you other thousands of consensual “Penile selfie Tweeters?” There may be a massive secret testicle file somewhere.

BEWARE!! …Murdoch’s empire stretches from one end of monopoly to the other…and it’s gone past go!

Murdoch is so arrogant he makes Ted Cruz look like he has humility…

Murdoch has been called a tyrant, a power mad egomaniac, a ruthless immoral journalistic dictator… and that was just by his ex-wife!

Rupert “cares so deeply” about the United States he’s taking the monies he’s earned here and has put a deposit down on buying the South of France.

Murdoch’s son might be thrown under the big red British bus…that’s the chance you take when daddy has the morals of a hungry river crocodile stalking a kindergarten swimming class.

Reached recently Murdoch told reporters he took full responsibility for blaming the scandal on everyone one but himself.

Many politicians and celebrities are worried that they’ve been hacked by the Murdoch Empire…

Right here in Hollywood.Joan Rivers is investigating whether Fox News has found out about the blue prints to her next new face.

Nancy Pelosi worried that her retro collection of  Young Rampant Sylvester Stallone photos will be revealed.

There’s even a report that Murdoch has the secret architectural plans for the Rush Limbaugh’s oxycodone warehouse.

“This is my Shemp impression how’d you like it Moe ?

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