John Boehner cracked the Congressional whip today with all the power of a Hugh Hefner hard on!

John Boehner told the TEA PARTY “its my way or the highway or your way and not my way on the highway or even Norway or the highway..take your pick you insane extremist nut-bags!”

John Boehner postponed comment on the President due to being infected with a serious case of  pathetic whining pleading plus a 5 martini lunch attack.

Boehner’s influence was getting as much resistance from the Tea Party as Marcus Bachmann got when he tried to “get the gay out” of Ru Paul!

The radicals in the Tea Party last night told Boehner he was  a good first step into  “a complete catastrophic calamity!” but they only go along with if it was amended to “The end of America way of life as we know it!”

Eric Cantor yesterday was still pretending to support Boehner while dancing on his imaginary grave.

Boehner’s Republican Party was in such disarray today it looked like it had just hit an iceberg.

Boehner said late last night he had decided he’d try his always popular “Drinks are on the House!!” tactic.

Boehner is thinking of retiring earlier than expected..liked in the next ten minutes!

When the Tea Party turned on Boehner he went as orange as a Nordstrom’s designer sheet.

Boehner’s position as SPEAKER OF THE HOUSE is fading as quick as a day without a visit to the salon!

Eric Cantor secretly sent him an application form for a job as a Wal-Mart greeter.

They’re saying that the Tea Party People in Congress are so irrational they actually believe Sarah Palin  has enough functioning intelligence to ride a bike.

Boehner will try again today to force Congress to get real… or he’ll take their Tonka Toys and their Angry Birds games away from them.

***This could all change momentarily if Boehner promises the Tea Party people 132 virgins to sign off !



There are no comments on this post.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: