“PAT BUCHANAN’S BRAIN LEAVES FOR MARS!!”

Shock reactions are pouring in from across the country as racist Pat Buchanan… in the middle of an MSBC rant today… suddenly was struck dumb and went into a catatonic state. He was removed from the set during a commercial break.

It was later discovered that a local Haitian voodoo priestess had gotten word that Pat was about to defend HERMAN CAIN’S gratuitous remarks about his own people being “brainwashed” by Liberals and Socialists.

The priestess immediately mixed some chicken blood with a Dr. Pepper and a toad’s ass and made a potion strong enough to drink so she go into a trance and “will Pat’s brain away” for the long trip to Mars.

Pat will remain rigid and stationary in bed as a relic of the past as a first example of the devastating consequences of arrogant racist right-wing media overkill.

“Madame Salty Sophia the Spell Lady” has become the flavor of the month in both voodoo and progressive circles. She’s promising more right-wing racist brain departures when called upon. 

Doctor Pepper however has issued a disclaimer.

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