DOCTOR JOKES…………………

editorAustralia has decided that being called “Down Under” is too pornographic sounding and will now like to be known as “Where Mel Gibson grew up to be an asshole!”

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In an economy move…This year’s Oscars red carpet is rumored to be last year’s Grammy’s red carpet  stitched together with this year’s Emmy’s red carpet and two of Adele’s old dresses.

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John McCain was found searching through Chuck Hagel’ s garbage last night for secret Benghazi documents or evidence that Chuck liked sex with farm animals.

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Colorado’s new marijuana laws have proved that an entire state can get behind really cranked up music and laughing in the face of adversity  and not doing too much exercise.

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The popularity of the United States Congress is so low that it does not show up on the Richter scale even when there’s an earthquake.

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In Italy because of the resignation of the Pope there will be a 21 gun salute which is rumored to be aimed at directly at the Vatican.

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Hillary Clinton will embark on her new career which is being called ” My Fee is $200,000 a night plus a private plane and servants!”

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In Texas meanwhile there’s word that Ted Cruz is thinking of running for Dictator.
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Ted Nugent shot himself in the foot,enjoyed it so much he shot himself in the other foot.

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Herman Cain has joined Fox News and will be called on when ever they need a bigger buffoon that Steve Doocy.
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Greece is currently recovering from being thought of having the worst economy in the World …followed closely of course by Lindsay Lohan.

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Lady Gaga will attend the Oscars dressed as a pregnant hamster covered in strawberry preserves the ensemble was designed by a drunken fool.

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Monsanto has announced that they have created a lettuce that can pick itself..

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