“SANTA JESUS!”……………

 

th_m_3507d6994ce041b2b3e5f6a9796b2c5aFOX NEWS’ MEYGN KELLY HAS OPENED UP A CAN OF WORMS!

We talking racist worms…

When an unthinking  blue-eyed member of the ‘Fox Blondes Brigade’ opens up her mouth and proclaims that “Santa is a white guy” and by the way “so was Jesus”.. comedy hell broke loose.

From what we can tell from reliable history facts Jesus was actually a smallish dark-skinned man who resembled a cross between a younger Billy Joel and Edward G Robinson.

He was brought up by Mary in a Jewish home where he learned about soup and guilt.

Joseph his father formed a singing group called “The Original Carpenters”. They toured on the Israelite circuit and Jesus was a roadie.

Some historians say during Jesus’ forgotten years he traveled to India where he met Buddha and they talked about spiritualism and baking.

There was a story that they became partners and opened the first Multi-Denomination cafe called ‘The New Deli!” specializing in kabob and blintz specials.

These are of course new stories which might never have come to light if MEYGN KELLY hadn’t opened her stupid bigot mouth.

…And just to set the record straight about Santa……

Historians disagree about the originals of Santa. Some respected scholars will tell you that Santa was originally “Sinta”.

Sinta was a Turkish Muslim who was filthy rich and gave away thousands of weapons as gifts to Muslim children during the sacred celebrations “DEATH TO THE INFIDELS!”

Other more careful theologians still cling to the MEYGN version.

Jesus and Santa are white as they fear that any other version of these sacred religious icons might see them being burnt at the stake by their fellow Christians.

Pissing off the Christians at Christmas time is not a great idea, they say most of them receive automatic weapons as their primary present.

 

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